What is the best thing to have at work?

Now that I am complete I thought I would share todays adventure.  Better to think of this as an adventure than misfortune I think.  Plus, I could see the humour in this from the get go.  Let the saga begin....

Nice bike ride in this morning.  Weather was chilly and my hands hurt but still – sun.  There was a bit of a breeze but since I had no wind last night, which surprised me, who can complain.  On Colonel By the cars and motorcycles were whizzing by and then there was the clown car.  Well, more of a clown jeep.  It was topless and very low to the ground.  It looked almost like this one.  Is it even legal?  Personally, I’d be embarrassed to drive it but this person seemed to be enjoying himself.

I continued on and got to the gym, had a shower and started to get dressed.  What do you think I forgot today?  Underwear.  A fairly important piece of clothing don’t you think?  I had them out this morning.  How did I manage to not put them in the bag with the rest of my clothes?  The other day a woman at the gym borrowed a towel from someone (who she appeared to know) and this morning, from conversation going around me, a woman borrowed a top from another woman.  I felt that asking for undies was a bit much and also pretty gross too.  Which reminds me of the plunger story…stay tuned.

So, I finish getting dressed (as much as I can) and went to the office.  I drop my belongings and head out on my underwear hunt.  How hard can it be to find underwear at 8:00 a.m. on a weekday morning downtown?  Hard!  Shoppers had some $17 squish everything you own briefs which reminded me too much of control top pantyhose which I despise.  Off to Rexall.  They have clear bra straps, nipple covers and boob lifters but no undies.  I’m sure that there used to be disposable undies and I laughed about them – that will teach me.  Sadly (and airily) I returned to the office thinking that at least I don’t have to worry about panty lines today.

All I could think of all morning was what if there was a fire?  I didn’t have underwear let alone clean underwear!!

This necessitated a change in lunch plans from going to the gym to going to the Rideau Centre.  Just so  you know should you ever have an undie emergency, Old Navy does not carry underwear.  Victoria’s Secret does though it is pricy.  So now my butt Is encapsulated in soft, fabulous underwear that I would not normally purchase.  I will now make a note to bring in emergency underwear to keep in my gym bag at work.

So, what is the plunger story?  Saturday the neighbours were having a party.  Now, I have only met the man who is renting next door, not his girlfriend/wife/roommate.  Later in the afternoon there is a knock at my door and there is a woman there who is not the girlfriend/wife/roommate.  She asks to borrow a plunger.  Um…..sure.  Gross.  Why someone could not go to Walmart is beyond me since we live so close to one.  Later that evening (after we had much discussion on what they would do about this) the doorbell rings again and it is the wife/girlfriend/roommate who introduces herself.  Can’t remember her name because I was distracted by the plunger she was carrying.  She was trying to return it.  I politely said no, you can keep it.  She said “oh no, I could wash it for you”.  Seriously, you are returning a used plunger that you are admitting you didn’t even wash!  Nope, you can keep it.  Now I have to buy another one.  I think they should have bought me a new one, right?

So, what lessons are we taking away today?

1.             Always double check that you have underwear either on your person or in your gym bag.

2.             Put emergency underwear in your gym bag or in your desk.

3.             Pay attention when packing your clothes.

4.             Don’t try to borrow undies or a plunger from a stranger because it is just gross.

5.             Underwearlessness isn’t so bad for a short time.

I figured out this morning that my 40 km daily round trip on the bike is actually 50 km.  Now I know why I’m so tired.

Yesterday’s ride home was, as I mentioned, lovely with no wind.  Along the way a bike with a child’s bike carrier on the back was coming towards me. I look over to see the child but no, it is a very squished adult human sitting in there.  All you could see was two feet and knees up near a head.  Why?